I knew it had been awhile since I had written my thoughts when I went to sign in and my mind went blank. A blank that I seldom experience as I am always thinking, usually to the point of exhaustion and lack of not wanting to write, but the mere exhaustion of simply thinking ending with a, 'I will write that later.', realizing that later does not too often come.
So this morning while I was out in a down pour thinking, I decided it was time to write and to write more in the future as there is plenty to say, its just the semantics of getting the words down on paper.
My trip to CHICAGO had high expectations, not by intention, but by subconscious design and every expectation was surpassed and then some. Not only was I ready to get away and excited to see Momma Carole, but I was excited to see CHICAGO, the shopping, the play WICKED, the Blue Man Group, the restaurants and most importantly, have conversation that consisted of unconditional love, the love I have experienced from her for almost half my life now. We started where we last left off only we had the ability to talk for nearly five days, without interruption and the feeling of success flowed through my veins, like the water I drank and the little food I ate and before I knew it, the trip was over, knowing our chances of seeing one another again in this lifetime are slim, very slim.
And although we did not talk about the possibilities of not seeing one another again, we both knew it. The writing was in our minds and it was obvious at times, sometimes awkward but the experience itself surpassed anything I could have imagined and for this I am forever grateful and thankful.
I took a collage of pictures and intend to post many as memories, our memories, but worth sharing to anyone who chooses to look or discover my writing.
I now rest with the plan of a possible cruise before the end of May followed by my much talked about trip to California. After that, I think no further at this point as my body continues to weaken, my mind more foggy and my spirit so wanting to fly to another space and time. I have defeated all critics and stunned the medical community with hope and will as in black and white, my body should have given way time ago and I still feel the fight, just less intense and I still feel the want, just more at peace with stopping and resting and telling myself and others, it is alright. My journey near completion.
So this morning while I was out in a down pour thinking, I decided it was time to write and to write more in the future as there is plenty to say, its just the semantics of getting the words down on paper.
My trip to CHICAGO had high expectations, not by intention, but by subconscious design and every expectation was surpassed and then some. Not only was I ready to get away and excited to see Momma Carole, but I was excited to see CHICAGO, the shopping, the play WICKED, the Blue Man Group, the restaurants and most importantly, have conversation that consisted of unconditional love, the love I have experienced from her for almost half my life now. We started where we last left off only we had the ability to talk for nearly five days, without interruption and the feeling of success flowed through my veins, like the water I drank and the little food I ate and before I knew it, the trip was over, knowing our chances of seeing one another again in this lifetime are slim, very slim.
And although we did not talk about the possibilities of not seeing one another again, we both knew it. The writing was in our minds and it was obvious at times, sometimes awkward but the experience itself surpassed anything I could have imagined and for this I am forever grateful and thankful.
I took a collage of pictures and intend to post many as memories, our memories, but worth sharing to anyone who chooses to look or discover my writing.
I now rest with the plan of a possible cruise before the end of May followed by my much talked about trip to California. After that, I think no further at this point as my body continues to weaken, my mind more foggy and my spirit so wanting to fly to another space and time. I have defeated all critics and stunned the medical community with hope and will as in black and white, my body should have given way time ago and I still feel the fight, just less intense and I still feel the want, just more at peace with stopping and resting and telling myself and others, it is alright. My journey near completion.
posted by the warrior at 2:18 AM
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