bleeding red
The day progressed and I went with my mother to the supermarket to get the items I needed to cook for her on Mother's Day, a small token to honor her on her day. And while at the store, my phone rings only to be greeted by Adult Protective Services on the other end, waiting at my parents' front door. So we went to check out with the eggs and cheese and peppers and mushrooms for omelets, potatoes for hash browns, fresh fruit, strawberries to be dipped in chocolate and cinnamon sticky buns, just what mother requested, comfort food for a day of rest and relaxation.
We spoke on the way home, mother and me, knowing not what to think of our next surprise guest. I greeted her only to learn that my hospice team, worried about my well being had called to have her investigate the possibility that I might endanger myself. And the only danger I was in at this point was physical and mental exhaustion from the morning and now, APS, with a series of questions asked in my direction.
And after answering all the questions with my mother and father listening intently and taking notes, I remained somber knowing that the team that continues to assure me that they are there to help me down my final journey days and they are there to walk hand in hand to comfort me and they are there to console my family and friends and they are there to carry out my final wishes and make my energy transfer calm and peaceful, and they are there with my best interest at heart CALLED and reported me, themselves.
They had a 'team' meeting and it was my 'team' minus me that decided and knew since early this morning that this visit was forthcoming and it was my 'team' that never broached the subject with me, but paraded behind my back with half truths and fiction instead of fact, filling me full of false hope and false promise as I, trying to remain stress free and focused, shook my head in disbelief as my confidence in there ability to care for me was shattered, my spirit jolted and my body lay with pure exhaustion from the darts so carefully tossed my way.
And the darts were pointed and the brass tips remain in my back, bleeding.
We spoke on the way home, mother and me, knowing not what to think of our next surprise guest. I greeted her only to learn that my hospice team, worried about my well being had called to have her investigate the possibility that I might endanger myself. And the only danger I was in at this point was physical and mental exhaustion from the morning and now, APS, with a series of questions asked in my direction.
And after answering all the questions with my mother and father listening intently and taking notes, I remained somber knowing that the team that continues to assure me that they are there to help me down my final journey days and they are there to walk hand in hand to comfort me and they are there to console my family and friends and they are there to carry out my final wishes and make my energy transfer calm and peaceful, and they are there with my best interest at heart CALLED and reported me, themselves.
They had a 'team' meeting and it was my 'team' minus me that decided and knew since early this morning that this visit was forthcoming and it was my 'team' that never broached the subject with me, but paraded behind my back with half truths and fiction instead of fact, filling me full of false hope and false promise as I, trying to remain stress free and focused, shook my head in disbelief as my confidence in there ability to care for me was shattered, my spirit jolted and my body lay with pure exhaustion from the darts so carefully tossed my way.
And the darts were pointed and the brass tips remain in my back, bleeding.
posted by the warrior at 11:53 PM
1 Comments:
Good Grief! I'm so sorry for your situation. I'm totally baffled by these so-called caring people that seem to be doing more harm than good. It seems as if they have failed to realize that they are the cause of much anxiety in your life. I truly hope that you can find some peace and enjoy mother's day with your family and loved ones.
Post a Comment
<< Home