tuesday 09.05

Today I spoke with many voices, with numbers and sometimes a name, all female, who are working for 'the uncle' INPUTTING data taken from a signed form by me, so that my insurance will continue paying for my hospice care and the state of Texas will pay for my deductible, as mandated by law.

Unfortunately, I fell through the cracks and now await an outcome that COULD be rectified with a simple phone call and key stroke, but will not be rectified because to solve the problem in a timely fashion or to expedite the request to solve the problem will cost the government money, money that belongs to me. And when I was told that the system is set up for an initial 45 day input period and then another 120 days to show the retro-action of the funds currently being withheld as one state releases me and Texas picks up my coverage, I asked for compassion as my situation warrants an expedite, considering my diagnosis and current decline.

So when I asked for a compassionate human being to speak with, I was greeted with pleasantness. When I asked that the compassion be in the form of an expedited input, there was silence and disbelief for the government is currently accruing interest on the money that it will retroactively pay me. When I explained that 120 days could most definitely be longer than I have to live, I was told, 'sorry to hear about that. I will put you in prayer'. And part of that prayer, obviously, was not to alter the input. So patiently I wait for what rightfully is mine but upon my death, can no longer be a claim and more money will be deducted until 'the uncle' runs out of day or I run out of days, which ever draws sooner. Regardless, the money that I could have used for yesterdays is not here today and will not be for tomorrows.