thoughts on posts

I have come to a mature understanding that I play host to an incurable and terminal disease. I have accepted my disease with grace and dignity, shedding a few tears, but not many along this most challenging journey.

I have also come to the understanding that although I am terminal, I am not the type of person, nor ever was, that will not fight the good fight, keep his armor polished and the sword very near and ready to use in less than a moments notice. There have been ups and downs and some changes but throughout I have remained true to myself and this is something I was lacking pre-diagnosis. It always was a part of me, my thoughts, my desires. I now have a shortened purpose to express them fully and faithfully and beyond my expectations for I have learned expectations cause hurt and less is more...

I still think and wonder and sometimes wish in my determination to LIVE my life and if I am able to teach another just a little something along the way, then I am successful and feel whole. Each time I write it is a thought or a scenario that has played or is currently playing in my life. The post may be over, but the challenges before me remain and the thinking continues for another moment, another hour and hopefully, another day.